\ Tag Archive for "P. J. O’Rourke" - Online Free Quotes Collection

Online Free Quotes Collection

Quotation For All Seasons

Government Quotes 46-50

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Government Quotes

Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores are us.
P. J. O’Rourke

Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there.
P. J. O’Rourke

Here is my first principle of foreign policy: good government at home.
William E. Gladstone

I have long believed taxpayers make better use of their money than the government ever could.
Kay Bailey Hutchison

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
Will Rogers

Government Quotes 1-5

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Government Quotes

For in reason, all government without the consent of the governed is the very definition of slavery.
Jonathan Swift

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
P. J. O’Rourke

Government “help” to business is just as disastrous as government persecution… the only way a government can be of service to national prosperity is by keeping its hands off.
Ayn Rand

Government alone cannot solve the problems we deal with in our correctional facilities, treatment centers, homeless shelters and crisis centers – we need our faith-based and community partners.
Dirk Kempthorne

Government is a trust, and the officers of the government are trustees. And both the trust and the trustees are created for the benefit of the people.
Henry Clay

Funny Quotes 81-85

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Funny Quotes
When I go to a bar, I don’t go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine.
David Brenner

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
George Burns

My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?
Margaret Smith

Never fight an inanimate object.
P. J. O’Rourke

A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck

Funny Quotes 41-45

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Funny Quotes
California is a fine place to live – if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.
P. J. O’Rourke

God did not intend religion to be an exercise club.
Naguib Mahfouz

Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
Erma Bombeck

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
George Burns

Funny Quotes 31-35

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Funny Quotes

Every man’s dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.
Jerry Lewis

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
P. J. O’Rourke

I’m undaunted in my quest to amuse myself by constantly changing my hair.
Hillary Clinton

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something’s wrong with me.
Elayne Boosler

If God wanted us to bend over he’d put diamonds on the floor.
Joan Rivers