\ Tag Archive for "Jerry Seinfeld" - Online Free Quotes Collection

Online Free Quotes Collection

Quotation For All Seasons

Funny Quotes 56-60

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Funny Quotes

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield

I have a love interest in every one of my films: a gun.
Arnold Schwarzenegger

I have a new philosophy. I’m only going to dread one day at a time.
Charles M. Schulz

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Lana Turner

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.
Jerry Seinfeld

Family Quotes 31-35

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Family Quotes
It takes a lot of work to put together a marriage, to put together a family and a home.
Elizabeth Edwards

It’s not that our family has no taste, it’s just that our family’s taste is inconsistent.
Dave Eggers

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.
Jerry Seinfeld

There’s nothing I value more than the closeness of friends and family, a smile as I pass someone on the street.
Willie Stargell

To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there.
Barbara Bush

Birthday Quotes 56-60

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Birthday Quotes

I hate birthdays.
Zane Grey

You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Bob Hope

You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, ‘See if you can blow this out.’
Jerry Seinfeld

Your children need your presence more than your presents.
Jesse Jackson

My mother asked me what I wanted for my birthday, so I said I wanted to read poetry with her.
Guy Johnson