Never floss with a stranger.
Never have more children than you have car windows.
The superfluous, a very necessary thing.
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
If two wrongs don’t make a right, try three.
Laurence J. Peter
When I go to a bar, I don’t go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine.
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?
Never fight an inanimate object.
P. J. O’Rourke
A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.
California is a fine place to live – if you happen to be an orange.
Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.
P. J. O’Rourke
God did not intend religion to be an exercise club.
Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Never order food in excess of your body weight.
Not eating meat is a decision, eating meat is an instinct.
I said to my friends that if I was going to starve, I might as well starve where the food is good.
I think Australian food is probably some of the best in the world.
I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead.
Italy will always have the best food.
Diane von Furstenberg
Know how to garnish food so that it is more appealing to the eye and even more flavorful than before.
Marilyn vos Savant
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.
I could talk food all day. I love good food.
I do love Italian food. Any kind of pasta or pizza. My new pig out food is Indian food. I eat Indian food like three times a week. It’s so good.
Jennifer Love Hewitt